Tweak

InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Furry eyebrows, anyone?"

fallen_mods (fallen_mods) wrote,
@ 2007-12-20 15:25:00

Fallen Leaves Guestbook
Non-players, community watchers and random passers-by, feel free to leave any comments/questions/suggestions here. We writers would all be delighted to hear what you think of us. XD

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Tearing at the seams

ashcat
2008-09-22 01:19 pm UTC (link)

I liked this but it definitely didn't feel like the end O_O So much left unsaid wow... so Tsume's family is even more disappointed/disapproving of her life choices.

And gah Ryouma freaking out about Tsume's familiar was well done and felt natural and just argh :( Ryouma will be a long time getting over this completely no matter what a good front he puts up.

Kakashi was so spot on here :) his reaction to the kids, the clan, and how he "rescued" himself and Ryouma and his need to protect them all :) it was just perfect!

Fantastic chapter :) I love how things are progressing I think it's good pacing!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Tearing at the seams -

fallen_tsume, 2008-09-22 01:30 pm UTC

Re: Tearing at the seams -

fallen_kakashi, 2008-09-25 06:46 am UTC

Re; Ordinary Miracles

fallen_tsume
2008-09-22 01:27 pm UTC (link)

Being lazy and copy + pasting from the rec I just tossed up... uh, all over. >.> (Only it had fancy links!)

So, I just read this fic called Ordinary Miracles by Sna. It's a one-shot (single post) that takes place in the Fallen Leaves world, about an ANBU medic, Hyuuga Haruichi, (several days) after rescuing one of the poor beleaguered ANBU from a nasty rotting-to-death-while-alive fate. I have no idea what writer would be so evil as to do that to their character. Shuddup.

I'm recc'ing it to EVERYONE not as part of the RP, but as a brilliant work of fanfic. Because, wow. Brilliant. And it does stand-alone; you don't need to read anything else to understand what's going on. Sna's brilliant like that. ;-D

It starts off with him heading home after a rotten (ha ha) day at medicy-work, and seeing his wife dancing in their apartment. Sna does an amazing job of building from "this has been a shitty day and I'm so exhausted I can't even be properly crabby and I just want to go HOME" (a feeling I think everyone recognizes), and in a few paragraphs slides into a breath-held nighttime beauty, the sort of wonder you feel when seeing that someone who's been through too much is still able to enjoy the world. There's this ghostly quality to her writing, like the whole world is waiting, suspended, that I don't often see people achieve.

Trying not to spoil things, the story moves on to deal with trauma the medics get from the things they see, and does so in a heartbreaking fashion that doesn't go overboard--Haruichi isn't an angsty person, and while it's horrific it's nicely understated. I find myself wincing for him and being glad he has someone there who understands him well enough not to hug and cuddle him right off the bat. ;) And that's awesome too--there isn't a cathartic moment of, "now everything will be all right!" but rather a slow solution to heartbreaking problems, which is more beautiful because it's real.

Ahhh. I loved this story. You should all go read it. I'm so gonna crosspost this rec over at hiddenvillage... :D

J

PS Sna, on another 'You're awesome' note, I LOVED how you quoted that line--great bit of continuity there--and I had writerly glee over the Tsume mention. Mwahaha. My character traumatized your character. >.> And poor Haruichi! No good deed and all that...

This was such an awesome bit of writing. :D

J

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Re; Ordinary Miracles -

fallen_haruichi, 2008-09-22 05:34 pm UTC

Re: Re; Ordinary Miracles -

fallen_haruichi, 2008-09-22 05:36 pm UTC

Breaking up is hard to do

ashcat
2008-09-22 01:30 pm UTC (link)

Ok first off.. MEGA SQUEE :D I've been waiting for this since the infamous Riverbank incident :D I was dying to see what would happen when Ginta and Kakashi encountered each other. I'm so glad this got written :)

So with so much expectation I had to rush through Tearing at the seams despite being exhausted to get to this thread since I felt like I *had* to read it before I went to bed :) (as I'd just gotten back in town after traveling for a few days).

So I'm squeeing my way through, trying to quietly cheer and gasp as my house guest was asleep heheh :) and I thought the first 3/4 was so well done :D Truly Nezu, Ginta had me in this thread. Up until now I'd been kidna on the fence about Ginta because he always comes off so cold and distant but here... damn I felt for him. He was the most human as you've written him I think, all the walls came down for a few moments and the reader finally got a glimpse of him. I think he can grow on me now :) that I've seen that little glimpse...

I felt like Kakashi had moments of being so Kakashi in this, his internal dialogue and his pushing and falling back and how he felt like Ryouma wasn't apart of it. But somehow he lost me at the end.

Somehow I was left... feeling confused. And perhaps that's what you both meant for it to be? I mean I've had those arguments where it spirals out of control fast and you and your friend are left very hurt and alone and confused about how did you get into such a fight...but I dunno there wasn't enough fight for me to get that full impression so maybe I just need to reread it when I'm less sleepy...

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Breaking up is hard to do -

fallen_tsume, 2008-09-22 03:51 pm UTC

Re: Breaking up is hard to do -

fallen_kakashi, 2008-09-25 06:39 am UTC

Re: Breaking up is hard to do -

fallen_ginta, 2008-11-01 09:06 pm UTC

Ordinary Miracles

lobademibu
2008-09-22 07:02 pm UTC (link)

Sna, every time you depict a little bit of Haruichi's relationship with Hoshi it makes me love him even more. He was one of my absolute favorites in Scarlet Spiral, so much so that I doubted you could do much to make him more lovable here in Fallen. But I was so delightfully wrong, because you gave him Hoshi, which gives him a world's worth of awesome over the Scarlet Haruichi. *cuddles Haruichi plushies*

Lately for my Jap Lit. class I've been reading and watching some truly shocking works containing some of the most graphic heartrending descriptions and depictions of the atrocious and horrifying human suffering that went on after the bombing of Hiroshima. Needless to say, my heart is very sore.

So I read this last night, and it was a much needed breath of fresh air. It was the caress of a cool breeze on stifling summer day. It was a little bit of balm for my emotionally exhausted soul. After all the disturbing things I've been studying, I think I needed that scene of Hoshi dancing almost as much as Haruichi did.

It was great to see Haruichi's vulnerability and how the two handled his panic, and just that last line:

It was something he finally accepted in that moment as he first watched her smile for him and bring him home.

Truly masterful stuff.

~♥*showers with luff*♥~

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Ordinary Miracles -

fallen_haruichi, 2008-09-23 04:15 pm UTC

	Ordinary Miracles ashcat 2008-09-23 12:51 pm UTC (link)
	Fantastic job SNA!! :) I really like the view into Haruichi he's such an awesome character and yay for having Hoshi in it too :) I loved the dancing and how lyrical it read along with the rest of it :) yay thanks for posting it! (Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Ordinary Miracles -

fallen_haruichi, 2008-09-23 04:22 pm UTC

	Heaven Forbid You End Up Alone fallen_ginta 2008-09-29 07:25 pm UTC (link)
	That was a real heartbreaker, I really enjoyed how you got so much mood into such elegantly succinct writing. I could smell the chemical-wrongness of that freshly-cleaned apartment, and hear the silence pressing in all around. Nice writing, as always. (Reply to this)

random :) Kakashi, Ginta, Ryouma

ashcat
2008-09-30 11:19 pm UTC (link)

I found a new song to be obsessive with during AMVs at Yaoi con and I can't help but think of Fallen leaves with it :)

Check it out: Happy Endings by Mika and Lyrics

I am reading what I missed while my friend was here and I was out of town :) but I did make sure I had Heaven Forbid you end up alone :) wow that's just...wow oh Kakashi the messes you make. I hope ryouma will not let you get away with your normal bullshit! :D (and yay I love the Fray!)

(Reply to this)

	Secret place... (Anonymous) 2008-10-02 03:19 am UTC (link)
	Where? tell me pls LaurienGirvenqdv683@live.com (Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Secret place... -

fallen_raidou, 2008-10-02 07:26 am UTC

Re: Secret place... -

fallen_ryouma, 2008-10-02 10:01 am UTC

Re: Secret place... -

fallen_tsume, 2008-10-02 03:52 pm UTC

(Anonymous)
2008-10-02 06:14 am UTC (link)

Dear Genma and Raidou writers:

you are both so amazing at what you do, and I had SO much fun reading the curry update!!!! I love how you guys write them, and to finally get what I've beenw aiting for since Scarlet Spiral came to life... be it nothing more than a kiss... Well, I'll be honest. I squeed. Hard. Finally!!!

And that it was Raidou who started the kiss!!! Even more squee-worthy!

There are so many things I like about this thread, the drunken slurring, the friendship, the tension, Raidou's constant OH MY GOD WHAT? freakouts, Genma's handful of metal, the scene at the club was so powerful, and then in the alley. RRRRRRRRRRR.

Thank you for writing this and making a fangirl happy. You're both awesome. <333

Kotszok

(Reply to this) (Thread)

fallen_senbon, 2008-11-01 09:08 pm UTC

...from LJ (dimestore_romeo)
(Anonymous)
2008-10-02 03:55 pm UTC (link)

On the Curry thread:

Dahlings, I love you so much. You have totally made my day, and given me a hot and sexy drunken kiss, which is more than Kakashi and Ginta can say (lol).

(Though I have a feeling we're counting down to gastronomic explosion time...)

On Tsume/Ryouma thread:

Keep up the good work, because I'm loving the vulnerability I can see here, and Tsume finally being brave and not backing away. A* and not even finished yet!

Hayate&Ryuichi:

Hilarious. Love the small child interaction. :D

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: ...from LJ (dimestore_romeo) -

fallen_ryuichi, 2008-10-02 06:17 pm UTC

Re: ...from LJ (dimestore_romeo) -

fallen_tsume, 2008-10-05 12:30 am UTC

Re: ...from LJ (dimestore_romeo) -

fallen_gekkou, 2008-10-05 09:25 pm UTC

Re: ...from LJ (dimestore_romeo) -

fallen_senbon, 2008-11-01 09:10 pm UTC

Just Promise To Keep Your Heart Broken
(Anonymous)
2008-10-06 09:58 pm UTC (link)

This... wha... oh man, you guys.
That's nuts.
So good. So, so, so well written. JB, you never fail to astound me with your descriptions of the conflicts and perceptions of a character who is so incredibly human-and-utterly-not. Kilerkki, Ryouma's inner dialogue is devastating and beautiful. I get invested in every last little guilty, guarded, heartbroken quandary those two come up with - and I owe that to both of your imaginations and your lovely, effortless syntax.

I'd say you two owe me a box of tissues, but considering what you've already given, I reckon we're square :o) Keep up the beautiful writing, you guys truly are amazing!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Just Promise To Keep Your Heart Broken -

fallen_ryouma, 2008-10-07 01:20 am UTC

Re: Just Promise To Keep Your Heart Broken -

fallen_tsume, 2008-10-09 01:14 am UTC

	Splendid (Anonymous) 2008-10-10 03:45 pm UTC (link)
	Man... Ryuichi is a hardass. I'm really enjoying the thread with him and Hayate! Fascinating to watch their interactions/reactions with/to one another. (Reply to this) (Thread)

fallen_ryuichi, 2008-10-10 08:30 pm UTC

fallen_gekkou, 2008-10-14 04:00 pm UTC

	(Anonymous) 2008-10-16 11:48 am UTC (link)
	Hanging Over YESSSSSSss <33333 I must say I absolutely love the idea of Genma not remembering what happened the previous night in the alleyway!!!! Very nice touch, I'm so excited to see where this is going. Oh and Raidou touching his lips and staring blankly at the wall, I loved that line <3333 kotszok (Reply to this) (Thread)

fallen_raidou, 2008-10-18 08:51 am UTC

fallen_senbon, 2008-10-18 02:54 pm UTC

From LJ (dimestore_romeo)
(Anonymous)
2008-10-18 04:19 am UTC (link)

Ah, Raidou and Genma are full of so much win at the moment. It's not just a river in Egypt, you know. I have a feeling that things are going to start coming to a head.

I mean, so far we have had:

- SEXAY drunken kissing

- OMFG we had sexay drunken kissing

-Actually, my best friend is kind of hot...BACK AWAY, BACK AWAY!

And all the mental anguish that comes with it. Plus, they are basically adopting a kid.

<3

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: From LJ (dimestore_romeo) -

fallen_raidou, 2008-10-18 08:52 am UTC

Re: From LJ (dimestore_romeo) -

fallen_senbon, 2008-10-18 02:56 pm UTC

Re: From LJ (dimestore_romeo) -

fallen_kaito, 2008-10-19 12:57 am UTC

	Re: Better than It Was (Anonymous) 2008-10-18 06:39 am UTC (link)
	D'AWWWWWWWW <33333 I love you guys. Kotszok (Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Better than It Was -

fallen_raidou, 2008-10-18 08:54 am UTC

Re: Better than It Was -

fallen_senbon, 2008-10-18 02:57 pm UTC

Re: Better than It Was - (Anonymous), 2008-10-20 10:26 am UTC

Great Community

y_sanada
2008-10-20 08:12 pm UTC (link)

I followed a link Kakashi posted at another community and have had the best time over the past week reading the posts here. Kakashi's interactions with everyone but especially Ryouma are what got me reading. I started from the beginning of the time line. When I got to Genma and Raidou's first mission I was hooked. I think everyone is doing an excellent job writing the trials, triumphs, determination, pain and insanity of the ANBU shinobi. I am definitely looking forward to reading more.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Great Community -

fallen_tsume, 2008-10-21 08:57 pm UTC

Re: Great Community -

fallen_kakashi, 2008-10-22 05:18 pm UTC

Re: Great Community -

fallen_ryouma, 2008-10-22 06:00 pm UTC

Re: Great Community -

fallen_senbon, 2008-11-01 09:13 pm UTC

Expletives Don't Cover It.

y_sanada
2008-10-23 08:14 pm UTC (link)

I am enjoying the interaction between the characters, but I find it a far stretch that Intel would put an ANBU under guardianship. Just doesn't fit ANBU and shinobi. Mentor (Seduction would be more Genma), partner (no, Raidou has a partner) friend - that would work, occasional team mate but not a guardian. I could see Raidou trying to be a big brother to the kid, but not because of an order.

Having said all of that, I really like the characters you both have developed. Good job on the original character.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Expletives Don't Cover It. -

fallen_tsume, 2008-10-25 07:31 pm UTC

Re: Expletives Don't Cover It. -

y_sanada, 2008-10-25 09:45 pm UTC

Re: Expletives Don't Cover It. -

fallen_kaito, 2008-10-25 10:03 pm UTC

Re: Expletives Don't Cover It. -

y_sanada, 2008-10-26 01:22 am UTC

Re: Expletives Don't Cover It. -

fallen_kaito, 2008-10-26 02:02 am UTC

Re: Expletives Don't Cover It. -

y_sanada, 2008-10-26 05:29 pm UTC

Re: Expletives Don't Cover It. -

fallen_senbon, 2008-11-01 10:23 pm UTC

	Ending of Raidou and Genma dancing date :) ashcat 2008-10-23 11:37 pm UTC (link)
	OMG! :) Finally some Genma and Raidou action even if it was just one kiss :D (but what a hot kiss <3) and that Raidou would initiate it then Genma talks about feelings (lol while 3 sheets to the wind) just fantastic :D I'm glad I finally found time to go and finish reading it :) can't wait to see what happens the morning after!! off to read (Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Ending of Raidou and Genma dancing date :) -

fallen_senbon, 2008-11-01 10:29 pm UTC

Keep your heart broken and End up alone

ashcat
2008-10-24 10:36 am UTC (link)

Oh my... what an interesting ending to the entire mission of doom... I really liked Tsume and Ryouma's interactions... both are only partially broken and both are trying to work around it so much even as they keep brushing against the broken parts. I like that Tsume didn't share with Ryouma it felt 'right' for it to play out that way :) maybe he can coax her into being more open later but it felt right for her not to be able to voice that despite his own confession. Lovely scene and I'm glad they found eachother to try to stave off the demons a while longer together :)

Kakashi *heart breaks* he's so broken it's like he's nothing but a duct taped mess :( and he's all laying alone and sad and lonely and here he gav the only dog he could summon to Ryouma who also got tsume and he has to lay there alone and upset and perhaps not even sure what he even feels or why he's awake :( oooo *cuddles* :( so sad!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Keep your heart broken and End up alone -

fallen_tsume, 2008-10-25 07:34 pm UTC

Just Promise to Keep Your Heart Broken -

fallen_ryouma, 2008-10-25 09:55 pm UTC

Re: Just Promise to Keep Your Heart Broken -

ashcat, 2008-10-26 04:37 pm UTC

Re: Keep your heart broken and End up alone -

fallen_kakashi, 2008-10-25 10:33 pm UTC

Re: Keep your heart broken and End up alone -

ashcat, 2008-10-26 04:38 pm UTC

Hanging Over

ashcat
2008-10-24 01:00 pm UTC (link)

Heh let me preface this by saying when I first starting reading all of this back in January that I thought Raidou and Genma would get a little romance and poor broken Kakashi would not find anything of emotional value other than angst.

Geezus have you two turned that on it's head! :) Now Kakashi has all kinds of confusion but ppl who do care about him and poor Raidou and Genma look headed for mega angst train city O_O

I'm sorta sad Genma didn't remember but that does conveniently allow you to draw this angst train out for quite a few more miles :)

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Hanging Over -

fallen_senbon, 2008-11-01 11:20 pm UTC

Empathy Is a Good Thing, Right?

y_sanada
2008-10-25 07:07 pm UTC (link)

OMG you did not just throw Genma into the frying pan as well? I don't think his fingers can handle it. He should have known better than commenting on Arisa's hairy legs. Some men just don't know when to keep quiet,

Nicely written. Good back ground on the failed attempts at Kaito's seduction trainings. The banter between Arisa and Genma showed two ninjas who knew how to maneuver within their own to get what they want/need.

As for Kaito, I really am liking his character. He comes across extremely shy and vulnerable, but on the last mission he had held it together under some very uncomfortable conditions, (being found naked and shackled.) And anybody who gets a lava lamp as his first piece of new furniture is cool in my book! Once he learns to calm down around Raidou and Genma, he should be fine.

Good luck Genma, you're going to need it.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Empathy Is a Good Thing, Right? -

fallen_tsume, 2008-10-25 07:37 pm UTC

Re: Empathy Is a Good Thing, Right? -

y_sanada, 2008-10-25 09:41 pm UTC

Re: Empathy Is a Good Thing, Right? -

fallen_senbon, 2008-11-02 12:03 am UTC

If the Door's Still Open

y_sanada
2008-10-25 07:28 pm UTC (link)

Angst fest. Poor Ginta. He certainly has been getting the sharp end of the deal recently, (not that everyone in this little arc hasn't been getting the sharp end, but Ryouma has Tsume, Kakashi & Shiba; while Ginta came home hurt alone only to be hurt and alone again.)

Excellent job of writing two very damaged (body & soul) individuals who are trying to come to grasps with where they are right now. Very well written and developed OC.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: If the Door's Still Open -

fallen_tsume, 2008-10-25 07:40 pm UTC

Re: If the Door's Still Open -

y_sanada, 2008-10-25 09:39 pm UTC

Re: If the Door's Still Open -

fallen_ryouma, 2008-10-25 09:59 pm UTC

Re: If the Door's Still Open -

y_sanada, 2008-10-25 11:44 pm UTC

Re: If the Door's Still Open -

fallen_ryouma, 2008-10-25 11:52 pm UTC

Re: If the Door's Still Open -

y_sanada, 2008-10-26 12:02 am UTC

Re: If the Door's Still Open -

fallen_ginta, 2008-11-02 12:13 am UTC

What Hell Is Like

y_sanada
2008-10-25 07:40 pm UTC (link)

I was wondering what had become of Obito. Oddly enough I think the thing many would consider to prove Kakashi's certifiable insanity is what keeps him partially sane and alive and that is Obito. And Obito hasn't been talking much recently.

Cloning himself into Minato. Poor Kakashi.

Very sad, but well written. I am totally amazed at how well you write the young ANBU Kakashi. I hope you continue to do so for some time.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: What Hell Is Like -

fallen_kakashi, 2008-10-25 10:47 pm UTC

Re: What Hell Is Like -

y_sanada, 2008-10-25 11:54 pm UTC

Much praise to all authors

mikasamu
2008-10-25 09:27 pm UTC (link)

I have been a happy reader of the terrific stories in Fallen Leaves for some time, and am very grateful for the opportunity to let you know how much I appreciate the uniformally superb writing. In "Expletives Don't Cover It" Kaito is perfectly depicted as the quintessential teenager, endearing, gawky and struggling. Raidou makes as perfect an older brother as one could hope for in the ANBU context. With Genma now added to the mix as seen in "Empathy is a Good Thing, Right?", I can hardly wait to see what comes next. It is the stories raising out of the Doom arc, however, which are tearing my heart. Shiba seems to be special to Kakashi, and her role has been a delight, making the end of her summoning all the more painful. That last unanswered call to not be left alone as Tsume and Ryouma found some comfort and rest together was haunting, with the pain confirmed in "Heaven Forbid You End Up Alone." The truths, insights, half-truths, and sharp exchanges in "If the Door's Still Open" cut straight to the heart, making us care so much for these characters, and for the one not physically present in the room. Incredible, rich dialogue, filled with long to be remembered lines. Then with "What Hell Is Like," Kakashi's aching exhaustion and despair simply radiates from the story. His determination to continue to be of use to his village is inspiring, but his use of a clone henged to resemble the Yondaime is like to rip the heart from the readers. So few words, but such a complete portrait is presented. Caring for Kakashi might well be a double-edged sword, but I hope that Ryouma or Ginta or both find a way to fill Kakashi's need to not be alone, as Ryouma so astutely observed. Perhaps there is finally a crack in Kakashi's wall so he might begin to understand that pushing others away neither protects them nor himself from caring for them? In any case, to all the authors, thank you so much for so many incredibly well written stories. Know please, that they are much appreciated and savored.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Much praise to all authors -

fallen_kaito, 2008-10-25 10:00 pm UTC

Re: Much praise to all authors -

fallen_ryouma, 2008-10-25 10:02 pm UTC

Re: Much praise to all authors -

fallen_kakashi, 2008-10-25 11:32 pm UTC

Re: Much praise to all authors -

fallen_ginta, 2008-11-02 12:34 am UTC

What Hell Is Like . . .

lobademibu
2008-10-26 12:43 am UTC (link)

Dearest Dark:

Read my icon. Can you read it? Okay. Read it again. And just for the hell of it, let me reiterate in here:

SCREW YOU!! DDDDDX

Are you bewildered yet? Good. Now let me tell you why I yelling non-obscenities at you.

You made me cry. Not just, oh look a little tear cry. Cry as in sob cry. Sob as in bawl sob. Bawl as in OMGHYPERVENTILATION bawl.

Congratulations. You have finally sequestered me from my incessant flirtation with line between love and hate for Kakashi, dug a ditch on the love side (at the UBER level), planted me in it, packed the soil back around me neatly, and beat me with the shovel a few times just for good measure.

Consequently, you also owe me a new box of tissues. *pelts you with empty box*

That's right, I FUCKIN RAN OUT.

Screw you.
~Loba

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: What Hell Is Like . . . -

fallen_kakashi, 2008-10-26 01:22 am UTC

Re: What Hell Is Like . . . -

lobademibu, 2008-10-26 01:33 am UTC

Re: What Hell Is Like . . . -

fallen_kakashi, 2008-10-26 02:03 am UTC

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